We've been here less than a month, and I'm genuinely excited to see how it comes together. We have a fireplace with a mantel this time, which means I don't have to craft something up just to hang our stockings.

My goal this year, and really this whole first year, is to buy the least amount possible. I want this house to come together organically. I don't want to rush out and fill it, because I know we can survive on the amount of stuff we have. We've done it for five years.

I still have boxes here. The packing party reveal is coming in another week or so. Those are the maybes, the things I'm not sure will ever come out of the box. If I can live without them, I can live without them.

Stand in your home and ask: How do I want this to feel? Who's going to be here? What's the purpose of our home this time of year? And what is the minimum it would take to get that feeling?

Say you want it to feel cozy. What comes to mind? Soft textures. Warmth. Fire. Candles. Warm beverages. Cuddling on the couch. Comfy socks. A mug of tea or hot chocolate or glühwein.

Now, what would it actually take to get there? I already have soft sweatshirts and sweaters. I already have cozy socks. I have candles. It's a matter of gathering those things in one place and being intentional about using them, and making sure we have time as a family to be together.

None of that required buying anything new. Some are consumables, so if I'm out of tea or hot chocolate, I'll buy those. If I don't have a cozy blanket, maybe that goes on a gift list. Maybe I decide I want real greenery or a garland this year, something that gets composted so I don't feel bad bringing it in. Fine. But then I make a plan for it.

We usually do this backwards. We see something cute on Instagram and think, I want that in my house. We don't think about where it goes, how it works in our space, or whether it actually gives us the feeling we're after. Decisions first, then decor.

On decluttering holiday decor: I know this one is hard. Here's what helps. Once you pull something out of storage and it's in your hands, everything feels important. But if you forgot you even had it, and it isn't sentimental, isn't a family heirloom, doesn't have your kid's handprint on it, that's your answer. You'd be fine letting it go.

If you're not quite there, put it in a pause box. Revisit it once all your decor is up. If you're missing something and it's in that box, bring it out. If not, let it go.

And let it go now. Maybe you were really into nutcrackers at one point and you're over it. Somebody else is looking for nutcrackers right now, and instead of buying plastic junk off Temu, they could have an authentic piece from 1992 and be thrilled about it.

Timing matters here. Thrift stores can only display holiday decor for so long. They aren't storing it for a year. The sooner you get yours there, the more likely it gets bought and used instead of landfilled.

So here's my commitment ask: declutter your holiday decor by the end of October. If you're with me, let's try it.

There are flat surfaces you're going to need this season. Set them up now.

A place for incoming items. We're all shopping online this time of year. Packages are coming. If you're hiding gifts from kids, find that spot now and make sure there's actually room in it.

You'll also want a place for incoming holiday cards. Last year I taped ours to the side of a bookshelf. This year I don't know yet, so that's homework for me too. And since we just moved, if I want to send cards I need to get them out early so everyone has our new address. I have some eager beaver friends who mail theirs right around Thanksgiving.

A place for wrapping, crafting, and card making. Signing, addressing, and stamping cards takes a surface. So does wrapping. I used to do it all on the floor, and now that I'm a little older, my back disagrees. I have a hanging wrapping paper and ribbon organizer that I pull down, use, and hang right back up. For crafting, I keep things in bins and move the whole bin to wherever I'm working.

A place for baking. If you bake, cook, or entertain, you need clear counter space. If your counters are covered in small appliances, that's a sign to spend some time decluttering the kitchen so those surfaces are helping you live rather than acting as storage.

And the dining table. I'm assuming you're already doing a nightly ten minute tidy, which is exactly what Tindy is for. Our whole family does these lightning tidies together and it's made a huge difference, mostly because I used to just forget. My husband built the app so it reminds me instead.

If you're not doing nightly tidies, at least get your dining table cleared before the season gets going. People are coming over in December, and I don't want you panic cleaning the day they arrive.

I used to panic clean. I'd grab a laundry basket, throw everything in it, and then that basket would sit for days or weeks. Sometimes I forgot what was in it. Sometimes I rebought things I already owned. It never felt good.

If you have kids, start planning what they want, and use this moment to declutter what they've outgrown or aren't using.

This is actually the easiest time of year to do it, because they can anticipate new things coming in, which makes it easier to let go of what they've fallen out of love with.

When our daughter was little, we talked about how Santa would redistribute toys. His helpers would pick them up, refurbish them, give them a new life, and send them back out into the world. It was a lovely way to teach generosity and a fun way to move toys out.

You can put them under the tree for Santa to collect. But I'd suggest doing it at Thanksgiving instead, tied to being thankful for what we have. That gets the toys to thrift stores, donation centers, and Buy Nothing groups while families are still shopping for gifts, instead of after Christmas when nobody's looking for toys anymore.

Now the harder conversation. Some of you have incredibly generous family members where gifts are the love language. I have a couple myself.

I wish I had magic words that made it stop. I don't. What I have is a mindset shift.

Your only job when someone gives you a gift is to thank them. Thank them for their generosity. Thank them for loving you enough to want to show it. That's how they show love.

You do not have to keep the gift forever. You do not have to feel guilty about donating it or passing it along. If you've already told them you're working hard to keep your home clutter free and they gift you something anyway, you are not morally obligated to keep it. You're obligated to say thank you. That's it. No excuses required.

Two things that have worked in our family:

A Secret Santa exchange. We started this a few years ago. I'd wanted to do it forever, but we needed someone else to suggest it, and once one person was on board everyone was. Now the adults each exchange with one other adult. One gift out, one gift in. We make wish lists so people know what we're after, and there's a spending cap so it doesn't get out of hand. It keeps the spirit of giving without the pile.

Experience gifts. Tell your family what experience you want. If your kids are into animals, ask the grandparents for a family pass to the local zoo. If they still want something to wrap, suggest a small stuffed animal of your kid's favorite zoo animal, wrapped with the pass. If the giver lives close enough, invite them along. If not, take pictures and send a thank you with them. Everybody wins, and none of it becomes clutter.

I know it's two months out. Pull out your calendar anyway, and use a pencil or an erasable pen.

Nothing is hard coded. You just want a baseline idea of what December looks like.

• Religious services you want to attend

• Get-togethers you know are coming (start asking friends about their plans now)

• Days set aside for baking, especially if baked goods are your neighbor gift

• Light displays, zoo lights, community events. Here in San Diego there's a lovely thing at Balboa Park.

And get your family involved, because this doesn't have to fall on you. Ask everyone: if we could only do three things this holiday season, what are your three?

In my house, with three of us, that's up to nine things. Some will overlap. We'll knock a few off. But we might comfortably do six. And you'll learn something useful. Maybe everyone wants to go ice skating and nobody actually cares about the lights. Good to know.

If you're hosting, reverse engineer it. Start with the day and work backward. What's the timeline? What has to be in place and when?

I have a holiday planner guide that walks you through exactly that reverse engineering process. It's $7 on my website and the link is in the show notes.

Do one pass. Spend 30 minutes with your decoration bins.

If that's too much, start with ten minutes and open one box. Just look.

Then come tell me what you found. I'm @wannabeclutterfree on Instagram. Do you feel more prepared, looking ahead instead of scrambling last minute? I want to know.

December is going to be busy no matter what. We're planning now so it's less hectic. But the only part you control is what's already in your house when December arrives.

Let's take control of the physical things, so we have more space, more capacity, and more margin for the things that actually matter.

Follow along in real time on Instagram at @WannabeClutterFree. I am documenting every single day of this.

New episodes every Wednesday. Find all the show notes at wannabeclutterfree.com.

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